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Sunday, August 28, 2011

Taking another look.

So what if I woke up at 6:00 A.M. on Sunday morning after not sleeping well, and so what if I woke up my very sound sleeping Fiancé at 6:00A.M. to tell him the power was out. Really, was it that bad?

This morning we woke [Ok, I woke up first and felt the need to wake up everyone in my reach, and it just happened to be him] to the effects of hurricane Irene passing through. I know that I could not compare to those who have been stranded, relocated, evacuated, hurt, or who have suffered tragedy in any sense of the word and my sincere thoughts and prayers go out to all. BUT, waking up and not having power to me was a tragedy. How would I do my hair, where would there be enough light to put on makeup, how was I going to make the pot of chili that I have been so hungry for but because of the warm weather haven't made? What about my computer? I actually can't go on the Internet? And let's not forget the coffee. WHY GOD WHY???? These are just some of the many random horrible thoughts that were going through my mind as I woke which truly is why I decided it was necessary to wake up my Fiancé and tell him. After all for most things in this world he has a solution, so why not this one? And he did as he opened his eyes slowly and looked at me saying " Really, you are waking me to tell me we don't have power? Wouldn't it be better to keep sleeping and then we wouldn't realize until a bit later"? And he actually laughed a little at me. I will be the first to admit that if he had done this same thing to me I would be "Fit To Be Tied", no laughter at all. More like yelling, cursing and anger. I can't stand being disturbed while sleeping. I can't even stand waking to my alarm in the morning. Anyone who has tried to wake me while I am sleeping knows it is a VERY VERY BAD thing.

What would we do all day? It was not a kid weekend [my 7 year old son see's his father every other weekend and his children see theirs every other weekend, their dad is my Fiancé this all ='s a combination of 4 children ranging in age from 17-7 every other weekend, therefore this was a kid free weekend]. Usually kid free weekend's include, sleeping in, running, estate sales, drinks at the pool, lunch and or dinner and sometimes movies. Today there would be no movies, no dinner, no travel, no electricity, no [ok, I won't go on like that anymore]. After about a 1/2 hour of my insanity he looked at me and said [here comes the real solution, he is so good at that] " We will go and see if there is power anywhere that sells coffee and we will get a coffee". One problem here, "I can't go out like this", I had eyeliner smears, cutoff sweats, a t-shirt, flip flops, and a God awful mess on top of my head that I sometimes call hair. After some convincing I went, and I actually went into the store and I got my coffee. So, after hours  [at least with caffeine in my body] power was back. And I am a happy girl again. A bit tired but happy. As for him, 4:30 in the afternoon and sleeping like a baby.

Many days I do not even turn the television on if I am home alone. And I don't always feel like I have to get on my computer. But today because I couldn't I wanted it. I wanted all of it. This relates to the theory that we humans always want what we can't have. The guy who dumped us seemed so awesome after we broke up and all those phone calls that were ignored turned into strong lust and desires to just get one more chance, often when I would get this chance I would realize "we really don't click" and eventually I could less if I ever saw him again. And let's not stop with the guys who either eventually seemed to have no lips, or too big of lips, or dressed in the wrong jeans, or chewed with his mouth open, or wore gray pants and brown shoes [sorry, but that is kind of funny] how about  the food? The double chocolate cake that we know we can't eat, but when we tell ourselves we can't eat it, we have to. I actually dream of it. I can't live without it! When I give in and buy it, I eat 1 piece and I end up throwing the rest because I forget it's there.

As I sit here without the lights on, even though I can easily turn them on, and I turn the television off because the volume is so loud that it bothers me, and I did finally shower and put makeup on, without anyone here to notice, I can't help but to think " I am happy with what I have". Time for Chili! I am just saying...

P.S. Please send thoughts and prayers to all of those who have been impacted so tragically in this storm! Stay Safe!

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